A BLACK LOVE STORY: A SENIOR'S PERSPECTIVE, PART 4 by FAIRY C. HAYES-SCOTT

 

Robert and Fairy Hayes-Scott

In A Black Love Story: A Senior’s Perspective, I provide entries from my diaries that share and reflect on my experiences with romance. This is Part 4 of my entries from 1980, along with my perspectives in 2025.

You may be interested in reading Preface To A Black Love Story: A Senior’s Perspective to learn how this series began.

Read Part 1 of A Black Love Story: A Senior’s Perspective HERE.

Read Part 2 of A Black Love Story: A Senior's Perspective HERE.

Read Part 3 of A Black Love Story: A Senior's Perspective HERE

Diary Entry—June 16, 1980

Dear Regioque (June 16) Oh, Bob got an offer for his house. Hopefully, things will go well. 

Oh, some Black folks really are a trip. Now, instead of complimenting Bob on getting his new job, they have to put some icky innuendo in it. Bob told me that the rumors coming from some Flint and A2 Black folks is he is goin’ back to his ex-wife. Gee, folks can be something.

And I have to be aware that, as Bob progresses, other innuendoes and lies will surface. God, please help both of us be strong and ignore them and grow in our love for one another. I am glad Bob told me the mess. God, please help me not act foolish or become weak and believe that kind of garbage. Gee, life is strange and the people in it are something else.

Oh, yesterday, Mums and Daddy came up. I treated Daddy to a Father’s Day dinner at Win Shuler’s. Everything was just perfect. Thank You.

Daddy was pleased with his cigarette case and cigarettes and card. I was very happy that I was able to give him the goodies. Gee, I’ve come a long way from being really tight financially.

Sir, I am going to miss Bob SO much when he moves to A2. The nightly calls mean so much to me. Sometimes, I feel like calling him up later on just to talk more, but many times I have nothing in particular to share. I just want to hear his voice. Oh, I love him SO much.

A BLACK LOVE STORY: A SENIOR'S PERSPECTIVE, PART 3 by FAIRY C. HAYES-SCOTT

Robert and Fairy Hayes-Scott

In A Black Love Story: A Senior’s Perspective, I provide entries from my diaries that share and reflect on my experiences with romance. This is Part 3 of my entries from 1980, along with my perspectives in 2025.

You may be interested in reading Preface To A Black Love Story: A Senior’s Perspective to learn how this series began.

You can read Part 1 of A Black Love Story: A Senior’s Perspective HERE.

You can read Part 2 of A Black Love Story: A Senior's Perspective HERE.

Diary Entry—January 4, 1980

Dear Regioque (January 4) Happy New Year! Thank you and All my Heavenly Friends for such a beautiful holiday.

On Christmas Eve Bob and I exchanged gifts. I received a lovely watch. thanky.

Mrs. Scott gave me a gorgeous scarf and Jeanne gave me some Halston lotion. I was touched.

Of course, I spent Christmas Day with Mums and Daddy and I visited Grandma Mary and Aunt Mattie. I picked up Aunt Rose for family dinner.

I saw Mums off at the airport with Daddy and I was treated to a luncheon by Cynthia. Later on that eve, Bob and I met Claire and Richard at Weber’s. A great meal and enjoyable conversation.

I had a lot of reading and met with Jillar over the holiday. Oh, I feel we’re goin’ to pass the prelims. We still continue to work hard. HELP!!!

Now, back to my socializing—on Sat. we, Bob and I, had a super time at Piper’s Alley with Joe and Claudette. The place was just like the movies. A good

group—Mainstreet—played some really good music! Oh, I had so much fun!

And I spent the rest of my time with Bob—very nice!

This was one of my happiest New Year’s Eve. Bob and I toasted the New Year with wine and buttered popcorn. I am grateful to God for Bob.

However, I am concerned that Bob might be too scared of the idea of marriage. But I figure I have to let God handle Bob. He’s brought us this far; I have trust He’ll take care of Bob’s anxieties.

It’s like a spiritual that a friend reminded me of: You’ve brought me this far, Lord; I know it wasn’t to let me down.

I am going to believe this in regard to my prelims and Bob. I’m to hold onto God’s Coattails.

I want to be a first-rate Ph.D. and a first-rate wife of Bob Scott. Help!

I love Bob so much. Thank You, God, for sending him to me.

A BLACK LOVE STORY: A SENIOR'S PERSPECTIVE, PART 2 by FAIRY C. HAYES-SCOTT

Robert and Fairy Hayes-Scott

This is Part 2 of A Black Love Story: A Senior’s Perspective, where I provide entries from my diaries that share and reflect on my experiences with romance. You can read Part 1 of A Black Love Story: A Senior’s Perspective HERE.

You may also be interested in reading Preface To A Black Love Story: A Senior’s Perspective to learn how this series began.

Diary Entry—June 23, 1979

Dear Regioque (June 23) I had a very lovely time at Bob’s house. He has furnished it nicely. He was a first-rate gentleman. We spent the eve talkin’ and talkin’. I could have stayed longer and chatted, but I realized it was getting late (1:00 AM).

I let him know I appreciated his honesty. And he responded that was due to me. Indeed, that was a compliment.

We both admitted how comfortable we were together. And that is true. For a second I was a bit apprehensive before arriving at his place. I mean I didn’t know if maybe he’d—well, I don’t know —maybe be aggressive. Thank Goodness, he was his nice self, and I enjoyed every minute with him.

Although I have a lot to do tomorrow, I would still like to see Bob. I can’t explain my feelings. I’m not in love. I have no physical attraction, but I dig his personness, his warmth, his sincerity, etc. I miss him. I need your and God’s guidance.

I can share so much with him. Gee, it is beautiful. Please, God, help me proceed with caution. Thine Will be Done.

2025

It can be in 1978 or 2025; it is most important that a couple can comfortably communicate. Sometimes, during an early part of a possible relationship, it may not be a “love-at-first-sight” moment. It’s not like in the movies. A “for real” relationship takes time.

Do you like sitting and talking with the individual? Do you enjoy laughing with the individual? Do you seem to have more in common than just lust for one another? If lust is the basis of the relationship, it will not really last as a satisfying relationship. That was the case in 1978, and still is in 2025.

Diary Entry—June 30, 1979

Dear Regioque (June 30) I arrived at the National Technical Institute for the Deaf (NTID) [the college where I did my internship preparing for my doctorate] on Tuesday afternoon, June 26 as planned.

I am very pleased with my roommate. She is a sharp Black woman working on her doctorate at Ball State University. She is really making my stay here enjoyable. We have engaged in some very interesting conversations.

On a different note, I think of Bob Scott a lot. I wonder
does he think of me? I miss hearing his voice. I would like to talk with him. I would like to see him. However, I am letting God handle things. I do not want to come on too strong.

2025

My academic and social experiences were memorable at NTID. The professors and the people whom I met in the dorm really expanded my growth and understanding of Deafness. Also, my being away from Bob really solidified my feelings about him.

MANA and RDP Wants to Showcase Black Greek Authors and Aspiring Authors!

MarketingNewAuthors.com (MANA), and its parent company Robbie Dean Press (RDP) are committed to showcasing the work of diverse groups of authors.

This month, the two Ann Arbor, MI-based companies are issuing a call for published authors and manuscripts by aspiring authors who are members of the Divine Nine Black Greek organizations. 

Several members of Black Greek organizations have already published books with MANA and RDP. To view these books and learn more about the authors, visit MANA's website HERE. 

Now, check out the offers for published authors and aspiring authors below: 

For Published Authors

If you are already an author, MANA, a self-publishing company, invites you to display your book on MANA’s website. If you choose to promote your book, please send:

• A description of your book

• A brief biography of yourself

• A JPEG image of the book cover as an attachment.

Authors will receive a royalty of 70 percent of the money paid to MANA. The cost to promote your books on MANA’s website:

• $100 registration fee
• $19.13 per month (a minimum of six months) showcase fee

Should You Self-Publish? Here Are 5 Signs ToHelp You Determine Whether Self-Publishing is Right For You

More and more authors are choosing the self-publishing process for publishing their books. So, how do you know if self-publishing is the best option for you?

Five key signs may help you determine whether you can benefit from taking the self-publishing path and bring your literary creation to life.

1. Control Over the Creative Process

Self-publishing offers authors significant control over their work. To retain full creative control of a book’s content, design, and marketing, self-publishing offers writers ultimate decision-making power. This freedom enables authors to preserve their distinctive voice and vision without compromise.

2. A Strong Personal Brand

Established writers with a personal brand or a loyal following might see self-publishing as a seamless next step. If an author has an audience eager for new content, self-publishing can offer a direct path to share their work without the delays often associated with traditional publishing.

MANA Brings Back The Popular McGuffey Readers! Get Yours Now!

In 19th-century America, William Holmes McGuffey was one of the biggest names in educational publishing. McGuffey, creator of the renowned McGuffey Eclectic Readers, significantly impacted the reading, thinking, and behavior of generations of American children.

For decades, the McGuffey Readers were the foundation of classroom instruction across the United States, and they continue to influence discussions about values-based education today.

So, who was William Holmes McGuffey, and how did his Eclectic Readers become some of the most widely read educational texts in American history?

How the Readers Came to Be

Washington studied at Washington College (now Washington & Jefferson College) and became a professor at Miami University in Ohio.

In the early 1830s, the publishing firm Truman and Smith approached McGuffey with a request: Write a series of graded readers for primary school children. At that time, there was no national curriculum, and schools compiled texts of differing quality. The publishers saw a gap in the market and trusted McGuffey to fill it.

McGuffey began compiling and writing selections that were age-appropriate, morally instructive, and intellectually challenging. The first and second Readers were published in 1836.

Each book was structured to align with a child’s learning stage. For example, the early readers taught phonics, basic vocabulary, and introduced basic sentences, such as: The dog ran.

Challenges Faced During A Love Relationship by Dr. Fairy Hayes-Scott

Introduction

And they lived happily ever after. . . And that is kind of true for truly real love relationships. There will be bumps in any relationship. That is what is called “life.” The test is how the individuals face and cope with those bumps. And that is what this section will illustrate.

Just as in the other part of my narrative, A Black Love Story: A Senior's Perspective, I shall transcribe from my diary; then, I shall share my perspectives as a senior who has looked back and garnered some wisdom that I wish to share with my readers.

Now, you may note that I have not entitled this section, Challenges Faced During a Black Love Relationship. Why not? NO matter one’s ethnicity or race, one or more of these challenges will be faced by any couple and you do not have to look out for them; if you live long enough, something will happen.

Some challenge will “rock your world.” Don’t look for it; it will happen, sometimes, when you least expect it. Then, you will see what you and your loved one are really made of—for the long haul or just for a short run.

OK, let me start. . .

Challenge One: Learning to Communicate One’s True Feelings to One Another

Diary Entry

Dear Regioque (Feb. 29, 1980) I talked with Bob last night about different things. It was interesting that he remarked that some women whom he had dated saw marriage as a fairy tale. I quickly noted what I thought he was implying. And I firmly let him know I’m under no illusions. However, I choose not to focus on the banal side of marriage. I was slightly annoyed but not as fumed as I used to be months ago. And what was good was we could express our feelings freely.

Also, I let him know how I felt about living in the same city as his ex-wife lived. I do not want to live in the same city as she, but I recognize that his new job would require that he lived in the city he worked. Well, at least I feel good to be able to get that out of my system. I feel if this relationship is to REALLY grow we must be able to say what we feel without fear of repercussions.

Earlier this week we discussed how we planned to spend this weekend. I wanted him to come over tonight; he wanted to wait until Saturday. I didn’t say anything that night. I needed to think about it, and I perceived he was pooped. But it did bother me.

At first I questioned if this were a repeat of past relationships. Then, I felt this just reaffirmed our not marrying regardless of his statements that he cared for me. Then, I wanted to talk to someone. But nope. I decided to discuss my concerns with him the following night.

That was good. I figured it’s best to let the person I’m involved with know my reservations.

2025

No matter how mature one may be in age or how many degrees one may have, these issues mean nothing when it comes to romance. Well, let me say in regards to myself. I had been hurt in the past. As much as I tried not to let the past influence my thoughts and feelings, it did, and that was not Bob’s fault; that was on me.

Yes, I was insecure. And I did not want to get hurt again. I did not want to be a fool. And as one song in the 70s by The Main Ingredient said: “Everybody plays the fool; there’s no exception to the rule.” I had been a fool in some past relationships. And if this were to happen to me in this one with Bob, oh well, I would have to deal with it and move on.

This was not Bob’s fault. And so, I had to recognize that Bob had not done anything to make me distrust him; these were my fears, my insecurities, and I had to cope with them. I needed to allow myself to be vulnerable and share these fears and insecurities with the man whom I was with and know that I would not die if Bob turned out to be a liar and cheat, which he did not—whew!

One thing is certain: I did not die in the past, and I would not die if my relationship with Bob had not gone well. Yes, I would have snot-nose cried, but not died. And that is what I want to remind every young woman out there. Yes, you may feel awful; you may feel like a fool, but you will LIVE!

Furthermore, if you really care for the guy, let him know how you feel. No man can read your mind; you have to communicate with him. This is the firm basis for a real love relationship. As the years continued, I would periodically re-read this Feb. 29 diary entry and remember to share my concerns, fears, and irritations with the man whom I was with, not with anyone else. And that level of open communication made our relationship/our marriage strong.

Diary Entry 

Create a Compelling Opening and Closing for Your Storytelling

An interesting opening and closing are essential parts of any well-crafted story. They frame the reader’s experience, grabbing attention at the start and leaving a lasting impression at the end. 

Without a strong opening, readers may never get past the first paragraph. Why? Because the opening sets the tone for the rest of the story. If you cannot reel in readers quickly, they will check out just as fast. 

The opening is the hook. It introduces stakes and raises questions. A great first line invites the reader into the story and makes them want to stay. You can create a compelling opening in different ways. One of the most common is using something surprising or odd-sounding that is then explained and leads into the rest of the story.

Take the first line in George Orwell’s book, 1984, as an example: 

It was a bright cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen. 

That line immediately signals something is off. That line grabs the reader's attention. In just a few words, Orwell hints at a familiar but twisted world.

Or consider the stark simplicity of Charles Dickens’s novel, A Tale of Two Cities: 

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. 

This is straightforward and introduces themes of extreme contrasts, emphasizing both the hope and despair of the French Revolution.

The best openings establish expectations for readers. A slow, plodding, or overly wordy opening makes it easy for readers to set aside the book and choose another one that competes for their attention.

The closing is just as important. A strong ending doesn’t merely finish a story—it completes it. It can repeat something from the beginning, tie up loose ends, and deliver an emotional payoff. 

PREFACE TO "A BLACK LOVE STORY: A SENIOR'S PERSPECTIVE by DR. FAIRY HAYES-SCOTT

There are several books written about love relationships by authors who have been divorced three and five times. You do not have to be married several times to be an expert on love relationships. And an author having been married one time is not necessarily an expert on love relationships. Nor can I, married for forty-four years, consider myself an expert. However, I do have something to share.

For well over fifty years, I have written in my diary. I began at age thirteen. Now, my diary is in volumes. I wanted my diary entries to be a way my children and grandchildren would know me when I leave this earth. 

My entries cover all facets of my life: professional, political, romantic, and more. My plan is to publish a book entitled, Are There Black Angels in Heaven? based on these entries and more—one side will provide the diary entry, and the other side will provide my perspective now as one who has more experience and perspective.

So, for MarketingNewAuthors.com’s blog, the MANA Sunriser, I provide entries that share and reflect on my experiences with romance. When I read my entries, I recognize how young I was and how much I wish I knew what I know now. I smile and let a tear fall, but boy, I am glad I have lived to share these entries with our readers.

So, I invite you to go HERE to read A Black Love Story: A Senior's Perspective. I invite you to leave your comments in the box below the story. Thank you!